Imitation Horn

the spotlight kid · Post by **the spotlight kid** » Sat Apr 12, 2003 10:35 pm

Teddy,if you drank in my local you would have the pleasure of being served by not one busty barmaid but three!They say good things come in threes!

Maybe this could be the reason I am down there so often and it's nothing to do with the beer?

Cheers the spotlight kid.

Teddy · Post by **Teddy** » Sat Apr 12, 2003 10:42 pm

Why you lecherous ole' goat Mr. SK.......it's no bloody wonder you had a massive heart attack......THREE of 'em is overdoin' it.

I have to watch MY blood pressure also.....I wouldn't risk more than one.

Best wishes
Teddy

the spotlight kid · Post by **the spotlight kid** » Sat Apr 12, 2003 10:49 pm

I find it keeps me young at heart and besides the only thing that makes me a dirty OLD man, is my age!

That's my excuse and I'm sticking to it!

Cheers the spotlight kid.

Post by **jim d,** » Sat Apr 12, 2003 11:51 pm

Spotlight and Teddy,

Even when the busty barmaid is not present I love the little pubs. The people are so nice and I always enjoy myself. Somehow, and I have no idea how

they know that I'm not local when I begin to speak with them. Inevitably, we discuss each others hometowns, families, homes, cars etc etc. Time for another pint, then another, then another....

Can't wait to go back.

Jim

Vagrant · Post by **Vagrant** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 2:08 am

Busty barmaids sounds far more interesting than the age thing.

Teddy · Post by **Teddy** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 8:35 am

Vagrant wrote:Busty barmaids sounds far more interesting than the age thing.

Mr. Vagrant,

Never has a truer word been spoken. And the most important element in the quintessential Olde English pub, is a busty barmaid (or in the case of Mr. SK's local pub...THREE! ).... if it also sells good beer and freshly made food it's success is assured.

Mr. Jim,

Glad you like our pubs...sadly they are getting gradually rarer.

Best wishes
Teddy

the spotlight kid · Post by **the spotlight kid** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 8:36 am

You're SO right!

They're the basic requirement for a good pub,ASWELL as good beer that is.You get the combination right and you have a busy pub! and I'm a happy man.

Cheers the spotlight kid.

TEDDY,not only do great minds think alike,but they also post at the same time!

Post by **jim d,** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 1:15 pm

Teddy,

I'm sorry to hear that they are getting rarer. Why is this?

Jim

Teddy · Post by **Teddy** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 3:42 pm

Mr. Jim,

I'm not too sure.....but I suspect it has to do with the "money" moving into the little villages and the "in yer face" requirement of the younger generation.

They ain't dead yet but you gotta look a bit harder to find a good one.

Best wishes
Teddy

Post by **Wally J. Corpse** » Sun Apr 13, 2003 8:40 pm

Greetings, Mr. Teddy-

Alas, I was summarily ditched by Bonzoid. After my daring escape, I waited patiently for him at the bus stop across from the dumpster behind K-Mart. Perhaps he din't rcognize me in my disguise. I was wearing my handmade toilet papier mache mask, of a dopey lookin' yaller fish head, complete with big orange ears and a green point on top o' the narrow cranial space. I think he may have been the one who sped on by that knocked me over with a can of MB.

AS ever,

Your ol' pal,

Wally J. Corpse

Gort · Post by **Gort** » Mon Apr 14, 2003 5:27 am

That and a good game of Skittles.

Teddy wrote:
Vagrant wrote:Busty barmaids sounds far more interesting than the age thing.
Mr. Vagrant,

And the most important element in the quintessential Olde English pub, is a busty barmaid (or in the case of Mr. SK's local pub...THREE! )..
Mr. Jim,

Glad you like our pubs...sadly they are getting gradually rarer.

Best wishes
Teddy

Teddy · Post by **Teddy** » Mon Apr 14, 2003 8:01 am

Bonzo wrote: Mr. Teddy,

Wally sounded fine when I talked with him last night on the electric telephone, but he said he just received his enema and state mandated LSD. He might have been slightly despondent when I told him I was heading out of town today for my trip to Eugene.

Mr. Wally,

I trust that you are now fully recovered from your little "trip" and the bad dream about the horrible fish head and ballistic can of MB is fading into distant memory. Perhaps the next time Mr. Bonzo visits you he should suggest to the staff that they reduce the dose a little, or at the very least deny you access to a PC whilst you are "under the influence" so to speak.

Best wishes for a speedy recovery
Teddy

ps. Mr. Gort, our little village pubs rarely have room for a skittle alley.

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Mon Apr 14, 2003 10:40 am

If you like busty barmaids, visit one of our "Hooters" drinking establishments.

The Falcon

Teddy · Post by **Teddy** » Mon Apr 14, 2003 10:59 am

Mr. Falcon,

Speaking as a connoisseur on the subject of "busty barmaids" it has to be said I am somewhat of a "purist" .....as I understand it, the Stateside "hooter" is more likely than not to be synthetic whilst the ones seen in the archetypical "olde English pub" are more likely to be natural.

Best wishes
Teddy

The Falcon · Post by **The Falcon** » Mon Apr 14, 2003 11:10 am

Teddy,

You're probably right. The only way to find out for sure would be to go into "Hooters" with a portable mamogram machine. But I'm pretty sure they've got some rule prohibiting "medical" exams on the premises.

The Falcon